Conrad Mbewe
Many people admire the work of pastors because of
what they see on Sundays. They look at a packed
auditorium of worshipers drinking in every word
from the pulpit as they are captivated by the
preaching and wish they could be in the preacher’s
shoes. What they do not realise is that for most of the week the life of a pastor
is spent counselling individuals. We live in a broken world filled with broken
lives. The people we see during the week in our offices, well-dressed and
looking like they have the world under their control, are often bruised and
battered by broken relationships. Pastors often handle these individuals behind
closed doors.
Yet, the number of cases that pastors handle would greatly diminish if
Christians can learn to counsel one another. Yes, we must not make the mistake
of concluding that counselling is such a complicated matter that only pastors
and professional counsellors should engage in it. The Bible urges us to counsel
one another in the body of Christ. It says, “Exhort one another every day, as
long as it is called ‘today,’ that none of you may be hardened by the
deceitfulness of sin” (Heb. 3:13). It also says, “And let us consider how to stir
up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is
the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the
Day drawing near” (Heb. 10:24–25). You can see that this is a responsibility to
be taken up by all believers. Exhorting, encouraging, and admonishing one
another is our corporate responsibility as believers.
Many of the issues that Christians wrestle with, which pull them down,
are due to a failure to apply basic biblical teaching to their lives when in the
heart of temptations or trials. Often, their fellow church members know about
this well before the church leaders do. By the time the elders get to know about
it, the sin would have already hardened. That is why as soon as you get to know that your brother or sister is struggling with something, it is important that you
quickly move in and share with them how God wants them to respond to that
situation. The English adage says, “A stitch in time saves nine.”
Of course, there are more complicated situations that will require you
to finally encourage your brother or sister to see one of your church leaders for
help. It is in such situations that pastors, who would have received training in
counselling, can take over and ply their trade together with their fellow elders.
In this issue of Reformation Zambia, we are addressing the issue of
counselling one another. Pastor Joseph Chisola deals with the kind of
relationships we need to have to have access to one another’s lives. If you are
not a loving person, people will see you as merely being a meddler in their
affairs when you try to help them. They will think you are judgmental.
Pastor Mwindula Mbewe shows us the plethora of issues that often
necessitate counselling. We often limit counselling to what we consider to be
BIG issues, like persistent marital unfaithfulness, alcohol and drug addiction,
and death in the family. There are many more areas in which we need to care
for one another by counselling one another as believers.
Mr Gregory Kanyanta writes a very helpful article on what we should
aim for in counselling. It is the deal clincher. We often think that our goal in
counselling is to help people overcome their problems. There is a greater goal
than that. Read the article and you can thank me later!
Finally, Pastor Million Kambuli helps us to answer the question, “At
what point should we handover counselling cases to our elders?” In other words,
when does counselling one another come to an end? If you have ever tried to
help other believers for any length of time, I am sure you have found yourself
asking this question. Ask no further. Pastor Kambuli has the answer for you.
What I find most gratifying about this issue of Reformation Zambia is
that all the articles are written by former students at the African Christian
University. We are beginning to see the fruit. These men studied this very topic
as they were studying for the Master of Arts in Pastoral Theology. They are also
practicing elders/pastors in their churches. So, they are writing from experience
and not just from academic learning. We do well to learn from such men!
